I am reading a book about the elusive golden mole. It is the world’s only iridescent mammal, which means that if one were to take a walk around the golden mole, they would see its colour change a hundred thousand times. Like a mirror, no one agrees on the mole’s true colour. Some report the mole to be gold and white, yet many report the mole to be blue and black. I am in the latter camp. However, when I showed my friend the same image of the golden mole, he stated it was gold and white. Until biologists can somehow capture and debuff the mole of its iridescence, the golden mole’s true colour will forever remain an unsolved mystery.
The reason I am thinking about this is because tonight in the Pleasure Garden, Rose Kingdom-Barron is wearing a dress. This dress is not only a major feat in costume design: it is also a breakthrough in the field of optical physics. Soft and billowy yet made from what appears to be a thousand shiny metallic rectangles, the way this dress reflects light could make even the most jaded scientist shout ‘eureka’.
A high-octane .midi file is playing and Rose is twirling around and the colours are changing so fast I have to keep blinking my eyes in order to keep track of them. Red, gold, yellow, green, blue, black, what, I cannot keep count. When the song finishes, Rose takes off the dress and puts it away. This is a major shame. I could look at the dress forever.
The show is called ROSE [LIVE]. It is a late night variety show in the same wheelhouse as The Muppet Show. When Rose speaks she sounds like Miss Piggy, but her responsibilities are Kermitesque. She is the host and beholden to a rambunctious cast of supporting characters such as Stagehand Elijah, Janitor Neil, and, The Package. There is a bit of comedy, some dancing, some sketches, and also, some special guests…
ROSE [LIVE]. Photography by Mitchell Tweed.
Friday night’s show featured Australian children’s author Timothy Winton. As a lifelong lover of all things Winton, it was a special privilege to hear him discuss his emotional connection with the sea. We were also treated to an excerpt from his upcoming novel, Prawn Moon, which I will hopefully find in a used bookstore soon. While Rose herself is known for her amorous stage persona, I believe Mr Winton may have misinterpreted her tone and body language, as he was behaving quite randy.
The second guest was a magician. His magic tricks were incredible. A pity he was so surly and rude. I wish he could have smiled more.
And sometimes we forget that the most special guests are the guests in charge of running the show. Miss Rose Kingdom-Barron, I tip my hat to you. It’s not easy being a Kermit-like figure. Guests run late, glasses get spilled, and ex-boyfriends call up in the middle of the show and disrupt the audio-visuals. I tip my hat once more and then I take my hat off in respect. Rose hosts the show with indomitable spirit and charisma, yet I do wish she could treat her stagehands with a little more patience. Although we may think them slovenly and foolish, we must not forget that stagehands are the mules that plough the fields that grows the hay that feeds the horses that carries the humans that comes to the show. Without sound handlers and floor cleaners, there is no ROSE [LIVE].
ROSE [LIVE]. Photography by Mitchell Tweed.
And I would like to sing some praises for stagehand Elijah here. Stalling for time while Timothy Winton ran late, the stagehand put down his mop and told a series of insightful jokes about his cultural identity, and they say laughter and learning are mutually exclusive, but I never agreed with this. I laughed and I learned. But if I have one bone to pick, I do wish he would write a little smaller on his palm cards. Even with my paltry eyesight, sitting backstage I could still read his punchlines before he had the chance to say them, which deflated the impact of some of his jokes. Still, I would definitely be keen to see a Stagehand Elijah solo show in 2025.
At one point in the show, stagehand Elijah performed a Michael Jackson style moonwalk while sitting in a chair. It was incredibly impressive, but somewhat distracting and I lost a good ten minutes of showtime by looking down at my feet and trying to figure out how to do it myself. Sure, party tricks can be a good way to break the ice, but they can also distract us from what is truly important: human connection.
Rose and Elijah, the stars may shine bright, but you can’t hold a star in your hand like you can a firm handshake. At the end of the night when janitor Neil looked me in the eye and shook my hand, I felt like I had not only seen a good show, but I had also felt seen. Although janitor Neil is just a cleaner, I knew that if push came to shove and the Pleasure Garden was on fire and I could only rescue one person, I would pick janitor Neil. He is diligent in his duties, and acts with a pleasant and humorous demeanor. I would not hesitate to recommend him to anyone seeking a janitor for their next fringe show.
ROSE [LIVE] will hopefully return again. If you buy a ticket you’ll be guaranteed to feel the emotions of: awe, laughing, and friendship. I believe that with some attitudinal adjustments of certain hosts and guests, ROSE [LIVE] will grow from its Muppet Show roots to be more like a good show, such as Oprah or Rove.
Rating:
[Image description: 5 stars. Three of them are gold and one is rose gold and one is made from the pelt of the golden mole]
ROSE [LIVE] is on at Fringe World Feb 9-10, 16-17.